i made this carrd a year ago when i didn't label my sexuality, but now i do identify with a label. with that being said, i know i can't answer from the perspective of someone who doesn't label, but i'm still willing to answer any questions you might have. feel free to dm me on twitter or ask something on curiouscat.
!!! please read the faq before sending me a dm or a cc
to people who don't label: i don't want to speak over you, this carrd is going off of the experience that i had when i didn't label and things that i read online or from other people. please let me know if anything in this carrd is wrong or offensive and i will change it asap.
★ what does having an unlabeled sexual identity mean?
while not labeling can have different meaning to different individuals, typically it means choosing to not label yourself using the standard labels in the community, such as lesbian, gay, bi, pan, etc. depending on the person, they might also not want to use umbrella terms such as queer, sapphic, achillean, etc.
this could be because of trauma related to a certain label, not feeling like you fit into any label, just not wanting to use a label to identify, or many other reasons.
no!! not wanting to label your sexuality does not equal queerbaiting.
if someone who doesn't label their sexuality is interested in someone of a different gender, that doesn't make them straight, and interest in the same gender doesn't make them lesbian or gay. they don't label their sexuality for a reason, don't push labels on them.
★ if you don't label your sexuality you're questioning and are going to identify with a label at some point.
remember that not everyone has the same reason for not wanting to label their sexuality. for some, it might be that they aren't sure which label fits them best yet. in that case, they might identify with a label at some point, which is valid. but some people don't label because they aren't comfy with labels at all. in that case, they might never identify with a label. which is also valid!
★ people who don't label are not a part of the lgbtq+ community.
extremely incorrect. anyone who is not cisgender, not heterosexual, and/or not allosexual is included in the lgbtq+ community. whether or not they identify with a label does not determine their belonging.
★ frequently asked questions: please read this before asking a question in my cc or dms. if you ask me a question that i answered here i will probably ignore it. please also keep in mind that i can not tell you your own identity. please do not ask me what sexuality i think you might be, only you can know that. -
★ does not labeling only apply to sexuality? can it also apply to gender identities and a-spec identities? yes it can! it can apply to any part of your identity that you dont feel comfortable labeling!
★ what pronouns do non-labeling people use? depends on the person! there's not one set of pronouns that each individual who doesn't label has to use.
★ doesn't the non-labeling pride flag turn unlabeled into a label? nope! if the flag personally makes you uncomfy and you dont want to use it, you totally don't have to! but it helps a lot of people feel like more a part of the lgbtq+ community and the flag recognizes the community of people who don't label.
★ do you have any other resources on not labeling yourself? these are the only other two i have been able to find: here and here. i also have not been able to find any resources in languages besides english. currently the only two translations of this carrd available are spanish and hebrew.
★ can straight people be unlabeled? most people who don't label are either not het, not cis, or not allosexual. if you are a cishet allosexual no one can stop you from choosing not to label but just know because you dont label doesn't mean you are a part of the lgbtq+ community and doesn't mean you can reclaim lgbtq slurs or engage in lgbtq discourse.
★ i dont want to label myself but i dont really feel comfortable calling myself 'unlabeled.' what do i do? i get that! recently people have been twisting the meaning of 'unlabeled' and making it seem like it's a label. if that has affected you and you no longer feel comfortable using 'unlabeled' to describe yourself, that's okay! i felt like that for a while too. you can always use the term non-labeling, or if that's still too close for you, you can just say 'i dont label my sexuality/gender identity/etc.'